For the first time in 9 years, I am not filling my bucket with new tools, ideas, and connections in Palm Springs. I'm not figuring out how to get to Sherman's Deli for breakfast, where the California Ed Chat meet-up should be, or what my slide deck looks like as I prepare for an upcoming presentation. I'm not reaching my step goal by 9 am, not reaching for another hug from an edtech friend, and I'm not reminiscing with longtime colleagues.
Instead, I'm coaching. I'm working. I'm dad-ing. I'm husband-ing.
And I'm really, really enjoying it.
For the past few years, it has been hectic. Even the internet noticed, and I don't wear this as a badge of honor. It had gotten out of hand.
Instead, I'm coaching. I'm working. I'm dad-ing. I'm husband-ing.
And I'm really, really enjoying it.
For the past few years, it has been hectic. Even the internet noticed, and I don't wear this as a badge of honor. It had gotten out of hand.
Theory: there are like four @Jstevens009's a la Calvin's duplicator. Only explanation I can come up with for how that guy gets it all done.
— Geoff Krall (@geoffkrall) September 1, 2017
Even before this tweet, which stung more than it should have, I had scaled back. In prior years, I was justifying speaking and consulting and conferencing in a number of ways. It was good for ____, it was benefitting me because ____, it was bringing value back to_____. All of those were true, but none of the blanks were filled with "family" as the direct reason. It was either me or my work, and it wasn't fair to the ones who love me most. What made it even harder is that my wife has been SOOOO supportive the whole time, encouraging me to say yes, do the thing, and be the person. It would have been much easier if she sat me down and said "no, John, I don't want you attending that."
Then, in mid-2017, I read a book called Essentialism, as recommended by Robert Kaplinsky. The book is a game-changer and I highly recommend everyone to read it, as it changed my perspective on life. In some ways, I was doing all those events because it fueled me. In other ways, I am now realizing that speaking/consulting/presenting began to consume me. It was never enough, as I was always thinking less of myself than others would think of me.
Therefore, I started saying yes to less, no to more, and finding a peaceful balance. Sure, I'll still speak/consult/present, but I'm being far more picky. To be honest, you're up against some pretty tough competition for my time.
At the closing ceremonies of Little League last spring, my son was distraught. His coach didn't make baseball fun and he wanted to quit. From his car seat, calling up to me, he asked if I would coach his team next year. Without batting an eye, I said yes. My old baseball coaching roots came out, and are currently on full display, as we are starting our season strong.
Then, in mid-2017, I read a book called Essentialism, as recommended by Robert Kaplinsky. The book is a game-changer and I highly recommend everyone to read it, as it changed my perspective on life. In some ways, I was doing all those events because it fueled me. In other ways, I am now realizing that speaking/consulting/presenting began to consume me. It was never enough, as I was always thinking less of myself than others would think of me.
Therefore, I started saying yes to less, no to more, and finding a peaceful balance. Sure, I'll still speak/consult/present, but I'm being far more picky. To be honest, you're up against some pretty tough competition for my time.
At the closing ceremonies of Little League last spring, my son was distraught. His coach didn't make baseball fun and he wanted to quit. From his car seat, calling up to me, he asked if I would coach his team next year. Without batting an eye, I said yes. My old baseball coaching roots came out, and are currently on full display, as we are starting our season strong.
When I had the opportunity to do a Classroom Chef workshop in Albany this January, the family went with me, touring upstate New York (yes, it's cold up there in January) and being together. It wasn't weird to have Daddy go off to work because they could now see what happens and I could deposit more coins in the family bank than ever before. We toured the Baseball Hall of Fame, ate great food, and used a work event to be closer as a family.
Coming back to present day, the annual CUE Conference is happening right now and there is a sense of FOMO that naturally sweeps all who did not get to attend, including me. There will be other events like CUE that I won't get to attend, but the trade-off is well worth it, as I get to be there for my kids in ways that many other fathers cannot.
So yes, please keep sharing the learning that happens at the next big--or small--conference, the next PD, and continue to make me better from afar. In the meantime, I'll find a few ways to learn in person from you all, but you can mostly find me here, behind my two boys with a smile on my face and pride in my heart. I get to be their dad, and that's a balance I am proud to have.
Happy "Balance" Fishing
Coming back to present day, the annual CUE Conference is happening right now and there is a sense of FOMO that naturally sweeps all who did not get to attend, including me. There will be other events like CUE that I won't get to attend, but the trade-off is well worth it, as I get to be there for my kids in ways that many other fathers cannot.
So yes, please keep sharing the learning that happens at the next big--or small--conference, the next PD, and continue to make me better from afar. In the meantime, I'll find a few ways to learn in person from you all, but you can mostly find me here, behind my two boys with a smile on my face and pride in my heart. I get to be their dad, and that's a balance I am proud to have.
Happy "Balance" Fishing
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